On insults

It may become illegal in Montreal to insult the police. Reading between the lines, the cops would like a reason to be able to arrest people when dealing with large crowds who aren’t actually breaking any other law (for example, celebrating a win by their sports team, or participating in a political demonstration), and they apparently don’t consider the current ordinance banning gatherings of 15 or more persons without a permit to give them enough discretion. On a related note, they’d also like a law making it illegal to cover one’s face, which would mean if nothing else that should I choose to abide by the law I’m going to be a lot less warmly dressed at protests in the winter from now on.

Yet to be announced, though, is what would constitute an ‘insult’. For example, what about “hey, that was mean of you to shoot that unarmed kid last summer”? Or, “you jerks should stop lobbying against a public inquiry if you’ve really got nothing to hide”?

But since the proposed law is vague, if you just love a man in uniform and want to ensure you’ve transgressed enough to get to try out his handcuffs, I suggest you stoop to the personally insulting. For example: “Hey, nice outfit, but I think if your hair was cropped shorter you’d be able to pull off that butch look even better. Would you like the number of my hair stylist?”

Good luck!